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Teenagers are a challenge. They turn from a happy child to an angry stranger right before your eyes, although it's often so sudden you never see it happen. One moment they're asking you for a story and the next they're asking you to leave. These developmental years can are likely to be difficult for the both of you, yet there are a few things that you can do to make the rough ride a little smoother.
Avoid arguing with your troubled teen. Winning a fight is an impossibility, even if you're right. Teenagers will rarely admit that they are at fault. Insisting that they are is a very bad idea. Often times a teenager will know that they're wrong, and even regret the mistake, but won't confess. Don't try to make them. It won't work.
Do not set your expectations of your teen too high or too low. Teens will interpret high expectations as impossible and give up trying to reach them altogether. However, low expectations will have the same effect. It will make them feel as though you don't believe them capable of success. Find a middle ground.
Make suggestions instead of demands. Teenagers will often refuse to do something just because you told them to do it. They are on the verge of adulthood and are struggling to find their independence. So instead of telling them to do something, try asking them. Challenging your teen to improve their grades has a much higher success rate than telling them to.
Choose your battles wisely. It is a great deal more important to stop your son from drinking than it is for him to make his bed.
Ask questions, but don't try to force them to give answers. If you do they will withdraw from you even further. In time your teen will open up to you on their own. When they do, listen to what they have to say and never criticize.
Give them some space and privacy. They are your responsibility, not your property. Everything needs room to grow, including teenagers.
They are going to make mistakes, you can't prevent that. However, when they do it is not your place to say "I told you so." They will learn from their mistakes on their own. Your job is to be there for them when they need support. Remember, teenagers are a challenge, but so are adults. You are both going to make mistakes.
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