Discipline child behavior without realizing it

Discipline and corporal punishment are two different concepts often mistaken as one. A well-disciplined child is one who knows that he is safe and secure within his family because he is loved and forms part of the giving and taking process. He realizes that love means giving and receiving and doing his part of the family chores to keep the household going. Daily family responsibilities and routines help form him into a well-functioning future citizen. Praise for what he has done correctly and not criticism for his failures energizes him into striving to be the best he can be.

Here are some ideas to help discipline your child without knowing it.

2- Children need free time as well, a time to play with friends or do after school activities to learn skills and to let out frustrations. They should know exactly when their free time is so they can make plans with their friends. But, they have to know just like adults that you do your work first, then you have your fun. Remember you are raising them for the real world to become good citizens, husbands, wives and workers,

3- Have them clean up right after their activity. After they take their clothes off, they should either hang them up or put them into the laundry hamper. After they play games or do homework, remind them to put the books, puzzles or equipment away. This saves articles like puzzle pieces from disappearing. This way they know where to find their things.

4- Have them make their beds as soon as they get up. It may not look perfect but it trains them to finish that job quickly. Simple chores, like setting the table for supper or clearing or helping with the dishes, only take about ten minutes, but they train them to be organized and give them that feeling that they too are an important member of the family. Saturday morning is always a good time to have them clear their bedrooms.

5- After school, children need a break from the books. That’s a good time for them to play outside aggressively: then they can do their homework right after supper. Full satisfied tummies allow them to concentrate on their studies. This way they’ve had the break they need and now can work much faster. Gradually quieten their activities so they’re not racing around just at bedtime. Perhaps let them relax with a bedtime story on tape if you are too busy to read to them, something cheerful that will help them sleep.

6- Do remember that children are the great imitators. If you yell and scream, they will. If you hit, they will. If you swear, they will. Try to modify your actions if you notice your children are doing this. Children will imitate you and any other adults or characters they see on television or in the movies. You might want to censor what they watch if their behaviour is becoming too aggressive.

7- Check their goals each day. You can use a sticker or a check mark for each finished item on the chart and an X for each unfinished item. Then, at the end of the week, when it comes time for their allowance, check the chart and deduct a certain amount of money for each item not checked off; but, do remember to give a bonus if they have all the items completed. This will be a positive incentive to work harder.

8- Discuss their behaviour when they go to bed. Praise them for having a good day or chat about why they had a bad one and how they can do better tomorrow. Always try to use a positive, encouraging tone, even when you have to point out their mistakes.

But above all, hug your child and let him know you love him. Tell him that every night when you say good night to him. You’d be surprised how this sets his sleeping time without any nightmares because he feels comfortable. Even if he’s been bad, stress the fact that you still love him; it’s his behaviour you don’t like and that can be changed very easily with his cooperation.

Physical punishment should only be a last resort. If you have to spank your child, make sure that it is done properly so he will not need another one; but, never do it in anger. Sometimes it’s wise to talk to a professional like your doctor, school councilor or even the police if he’s been in trouble with the law. If you are a single parent or if he’s too big for you to handle, never be afraid to seek proper professional advice. It will help you both get through this stage.

A positive attitude mixed with lots of love will conquer many hurtles. Always let him know that you love him; but, it’s his behaviour that needs to change. Try this and you will agree.